Us

in the immeasurable sadness of being,
and the ineffable joy of living,
in the inexplicable ecstasy of loving,
and the inevitable anguish in parting,
did i forget
to ask you
if
              you are
as scared
of the prospect of
us as
              i am
of the prospect of
you?

Of the Beauty of Truth

Coke studio is definitely impressive and though my two favourites are Paimana bitte and Chal diye, I am definitely moved by Khwaja Ghulam Farid's Husn-e-Haqiqi. Compared to the romantic poems, Sufi poetry in particular always perplexes me how people could feel so deeply about belief, faith and things in general abstract let alone put it down into such fluid verse.

Ai husne haqiqi noor e azal	O’ Beauty of Truth, the Eternal Light!
Tenu waajib te imkaan kahun	Do I call you necessity and possibility,
Tenu khalik zaat qadeem kahun	Do I call you the ancient divinity,
Tenu haadis khalq jahan kahun	The One, creation and the world,
Tenu mutlaq mehez wajood kahun	Do I call you free and pure Being,
Tenu almiya ayaan kahun	Or the apparent lord of all,
Arvaah nafoos aqool kahun	Do I call you the souls, the egos and the intellects,
Ashbaa iyaan nehaan kahun	The imbued manifest, and the imbued hidden,
Tenu ain haqeeqat maahiyat	The actual reality, the substance,
Tenu arz sifat te shaan kahun	The word, the attribute and dignity,
Anvaah kahun auzaah kahun	Do I call you the variety, and the circumstance,
Atvaar kahun auzaan kahun	The demeanor, and the measure,
Tenu arsh kahun aflaak kahun	Do I call you the throne and the firmament,
Tenu naaz naeem janaan kahun	And the demurring delights of Paradise,
Tenu tat jamaad nabaat kahun	Do I call you mineral and vegetable,
Haivaan kahun insaan kahun	Animal and human,
Tenu masjid mandir dair kahun	Do I call you the mosque, the temple, the monastery,
Tenu pothi te quran kahun	The scriptures, the Quran,
Tasbeeh kahun zunnaar kahun	The rosary, the girdle,
Tenu kufr kahun imaan kahun	Godlessness, and faith,
Tenu baadal barkha gaaj kahun	Do I call you the clouds, the flash, the thunder,
Tenu bijli te baraan kahun	Lightning and the downpour,
Tenu aab kahun kahun tenu khaak kahun	Water and earth,
Tenu baad kahun neeraan kahun	The gust and the inferno,
Tenu dasrat lichman raam kahun	Do I call you Lakshmi, and Ram
Tenu sita ji janaan kahun	and lovely Sita,
Baldev jasuda nand kahun	Baldev, Shiv, Nand,
Tenu kishan kanhaya kaan kahun	and Krishna,
Tenu barhma bishan ganesh kahun	Brahma, Vishnu and Ganesh,
Mahadev kahun bhagvaan kahun	Mahadev and Bhagvaan,
Teni geet granth te bed kahun	Do I call you the Gita, the Granth, and the Ved,
Tenu gyaan kahun agyaan kahun	Knowledge and the unknowable,
Tenu ibrahim hawa shees kahun	Do I call you Abraham, Eve and Seth,
Tenu nooh kahun tufaan kahun	Noah and the deluge,
Tenu ibrahim khaleel kahun	Abraham the friend,
Tenu musa bin imran kahun	and Moses son of Amran,
Tenu har dil da dildaar kahun	darling of every heart,
Tenu ahmad aalishaan kahun	And Ahmad the glorious,
Tenu shaahid malk hijaaz kahun	Do I call you the witness, the Lord, or Hejaz,
Tenu baais kaun makaan kahun	The awakener, existence, or the point,
Tenu naaz kahun andaaz kahun	Do I call you admiration or prognosis,
Tenu hoor pari ghilmaan kahun	Nymph, fairy, and the young lad,
Tenu nouk kahun tenu ttouk kahun	The tip and the nip,
Tenu surkhi beerha paan kahun	And the redness of betel leaves,
Tenu tabla te tamboor kahun	The Tabla and Tanpura,
Tenu dholak surr te taan kahun	The drum, the notes and the improvisation,
Tenu husn te haar singhaar kahun	Do I call you beauty and the fragrant flower,
Tenu ashwa ghamza aan kahun	Coyness and that amorous glance,
Tenu ishq kahun tenu ilm kahun	Do I call you Love and knowledge,
Tenu vehem yaqeen gumaan kahun	Superstition, belief, and conjecture,
Tenu husn kavi idraak kahun	The beauty of power, and conception,
Tenu zauk kahun wajdaan kahun	Aptitude and ecstasy,
Tenu sakar kahun sakraan kahun	Do I call you intoxication and the drunk,
Tenu hairat te hairaan kahun	Amazement and the amazed,
Tasleem kahun talveen kahun	Submission and the connection,
Tamkeen kahun irfaan kahun	Compliance and Gnosticism,
Tenu sumbal sosan sarv kahun	Do I call you the Hyacinth, the Lilly, and the Cypress,
Tenu nargis nafarmaan kahun	And the rebellious Narcissus,
Tenu laale daagh te baagh kahun	The bereaved Tulip, the Rose garden, and the orchard,
Gulzaar kahun bustaan kahun
Tenu khanjar teer tufang kahun	Do I call you the dagger, the lance, and the rifle,
Tenu barcha bank sanaan kahun	The hail, the bullet, the spear,
Tenu teer khidang kamaan kahun	The arrows made of white poplar, and the bow,
Soofaar kahun peekaan kahun	The arrow-notch, and the arrowhead,
Berang kahun bemisal kahun	Do I call you colorless, and unparalleled,
Besoorat har har aan kahun	Formless in every instant,
Subooh kahun qudoos kahun	Glory and holiness,
Rehman kahun subhaan kahun	Most glorious and most compassionate,
Kar taubaa tart Fareed sada	Repent now Farid forever!
Har sheh nu par nuksaan kahun	For whatever I may say is less,
Tenu paak alakh be aib kahun	Do I call you the pure and the humane,
Tenu haq be naam nishaan kahun	The Truth without trace or name

Husn-e-Haqiqi

Khwaja Ghulam Farid (1841–1901)

--

and for that remote minority of people who have never heard of coke-studio, check out Areib Azhar's rendition (italics not in the rendition). Their channel of course contains many nuggets of pure euphoria..

blah-017: The Vagabond

Give to me the life I love,
  Let the lave go by me,
Give the jolly heaven above
  And the byway nigh me.
Bed in the bush with stars to see,
  Bread I dip in the river -
There's the life for a man like me,
  There's the life for ever.

Let the blow fall soon or late,
  Let what will be o'er me;
Give the face of earth around,
  And the road before me.
Wealth I ask not, hope nor love,
  Nor a friend to know me;
All I ask, the heaven above
  And the road below me.

...

--

from Stevenson's The Vagabond

Life update: have been in a village named Bannerghatta in the City of Guards since 22nd June: enjoyable and full of fascinating people. Might be here for 2 years.

blah-016: Last Boy Scout

“Water is wet, sky is blue, women have secrets–who gives a fuck”

--

1. almost as profound as Chef's prostitute payment explanation.

ساحر

سوچتا ھن کی محبت سع کینارا کر لئن
دل کو بعگاناع ترگیب ہ تامانا کر لئن

-

ساحر لدھیانوی

--

सोचता हूँ कि मुहब्बत से किनारा कर लूँ
दिल को बेगाना-ए-तरग़ीब-ओ-तमन्ना कर लूँ

सोचता हूँ कि मुहब्बत है जुनून-ए-रसवा
चंद बेकार-से बेहूदा ख़यालों का हुजूम
एक आज़ाद को पाबंद बनाने की हवस
एक बेगाने को अपनाने की सइ-ए-मौहूम

सोचता हूँ कि मुहब्बत है सुरूर-ए-मस्ती
इसकी तन्वीर में रौशन है फ़ज़ा-ए-हस्ती

सोचता हूँ कि मुहब्बत है बशर की फ़ितरत
इसका मिट जाना, मिटा देना बहुत मुश्किल है
सोचता हूँ कि मुहब्बत से है ताबिंदा हयात
आप ये शमा बुझा देना बहुत मुश्किल है

सोचता हूँ कि मुहब्बत पे कड़ी शर्त हैं
इक तमद्दुन में मसर्रत पे बड़ी शर्त हैं

सोचता हूँ कि मुहब्बत है इक अफ़सुर्दा सी लाश
चादर-ए-इज़्ज़त-ओ-नामूस में कफ़नाई हुई
दौर-ए-सर्माया की रौंदी हुई रुसवा हस्ती
दरगह-ए-मज़हब-ओ-इख़्लाक़ से ठुकराई हुई

सोचता हूँ कि बशर और मुहब्बत का जुनूँ
ऐसी बोसीदा तमद्दुन से है इक कार-ए-ज़बूँ

सोचता हूँ कि मुहब्बत न बचेगी ज़िंदा
पेश-अज़-वक़्त की सड़ जाये ये गलती हुई लाश
यही बेहतर है कि बेगाना-ए-उल्फ़त होकर
अपने सीने में करूँ जज़्ब-ए-नफ़रत की तलाश

और सौदा-ए-मुहब्बत से किनारा कर लूँ
दिल को बेगाना-ए-तरग़ीब-ओ-तमन्ना कर लूँ

--

1. Read it first when a couple of years ago..Nothing reflects what i feel about محبت any better. Ofcourse my urdu typing skills don't match my enthusiastic fervor. Sahir is a true magician

2. Do check Mohsin Naqvi saab while you are at it.

3. Kavita Kosh : Sahir Ludhianvi

Agha Shahid Ali : Farewell

...
I am being rowed through Paradise in a river of Hell:
Exquisite ghost, it is night.

The paddle is a heart; it breaks the porcelain waves.
It is still night. The paddle is a lotus.
I am rowed- as it withers-toward the breeze which is soft as
if it had pity on me.

If only somehow you could have been mine, what wouldn't
have happened in the world?

I'm everything you lost. You won't forgive me.
My memory keeps getting in the way of your history.
There is nothing to forgive.You can't forgive me.
I hid my pain even from myself; I revealed my pain only to myself.

There is everything to forgive. You can't forgive me.

If only somehow you could have been mine,
what would not have been possible in the world?


--

Something I shouldn't have deleted. Read rest here

blah-015: Kyle XY

(Of all things never expected something like this from such a stupid series)

Sometimes a moment becomes a memory the instant it is happening, because it is so true, so pure, so significant, you want to capture it for ever.

--

Well, not so great after some pondering, but nevertheless..

世界の約束

涙の奥に　ゆらぐほほえみは
時の始めからの　世界の約束

いまは一人でも　二人の昨日から
今日は生まれきらめく
初めて会った　日のように
思い出のうちに　あなたはいない
そよかぜとなって　頬に触れてくる

木漏れ日の午後の　
別れのあとも
決して終わらない　世界の約束
いまは一人でも　明日は限りない
あなたが教えてくれた
夜にひそむ　やさしさ

思い出のうちに　あなたはいない
せせらぎの歌に　この空の色に
花の香りに　いつまでも生きて


--

The Promise of the World

beyond these tears
my flickering smile
holds the promise of love
from the beginning of time

even though i am alone now
this day is born aglow
with the light of our yesterdays
like the first time we spoke

somehow i lost you
among all my memories
you brushed past my face
softly as the breeze

though we slipped apart
like sunlight through the leaves
the promise of love
will live on eternally

even though i am alone now
my tomorrows are boundless
like the kindness you showed me
hidden in the night

somehow i lost you among all my memories
in a brook's gentle laughter
in the scent of a flower
in the depth of the sky
you will live on eternally

--
From Howl's Moving Castle
Something I remembered from long back.
Javidaan zindagi indeed

blah-014

The God of the Old Testament is arguably the most unpleasant character in all fiction: jealous and proud of it; a petty, unjust, unforgiving control-freak; a vindictive, bloodthirsty ethnic cleanser; a misogynistic, homophobic, racist, infanticidal, genocidal, filicidal, pestilential, megalomaniacal, sadomasochistic, capriciously malevolent bully.

Richard Dawkins, The God Delusion

blah-013: Shehzad

خواب جدا رنگ بھرنا اور
کھنا اور حی کرنا اور
صحرا کا دک سمجھی کون
حونا اور گزرنا اور
گھر میں رحنا بات جدا
دل میں جان اترنا اور
جان دکر بھی لگتا حی
مجھکو حی کچ مرنا اور

-
A wonderful piece by Farhat Shehzad.
I first came across Shehzad at alt.language.urdu.poetry. I particularly liked his "Ek bas tu hi nahi" ( tougher to type in Urdu for a beginner like me :( and therefore just linked) The above piece is roughly romanized below. Do listen to an extraordinary rendition of the same by Jalota.

khwaab judaa rang bharna aur
kehana aur hai karna aur
seharaa ka dukh samjhe kaun
hona aur guzarna aur
ghar mein rehana baat judaa
dil mein jaan utarnaa aur
jaan dekar bhi lagta hai
mujhko hai kuchh marna aur

But the lines I love the most are from "Ek bas tu hi nahi"

uth ke ma.nzil hii agar aaye to shaayad kuchh ho
shauq-e-ma.nzil me.n meraa aabalaapaa ho baiThaa

masalahat chhin gaii quvvat-e-guftaar magar
kuchh na kahanaa hii meraa merii sadaa ho baiThaa

[Note: Urdu fonts necessary for proper display. Typed using XKB .  Apologies for any typos ( unable to right hai properly for instance) Seems like scim does not have a Urdu interface]

blah-011

from Il y a longtemps que je t'aime (film)

Il y a longtemps que je t'aime
Jamais je ne t'oublierai¹.

-

Un jardin sous la plui

se doux triste comme moi sans toi

maman je veus pas que tu 

meure jamais on sera ensemble

toujour tu ai mon amour

(ton petit Pierre)²

-

[
1.
I have loved you for so long, I will never forget you.


2. 
Roughly (I should say conceptually):
A garden in the rain
Is peaceful and sad too.
Mummy, I feel the same
when I am far from you
Your smile lights up the sky
and makes me so happy.
If one day you must die,
do it after me.
You will always have my love.

Your son Pierre

PS: No wonder they say French is romantic. The film is fantastic

]

1283: my Socratic mom

Prelude

Euthyphro by Plato is a short dialogue between Socrates and Euthyphro which takes place near? the court where  Socrates has been summoned to face charges . The dialogue constantly reminds me of Borat at various occasions. You could read it at Perseus. It is a good idea to read the tetralogy ( Euthyphro, Apology, Crito, Phaedo) as one . Though considerably more though provoking than apology, I find many of the arguments really flimsy, and especially hate the habit of leaving certain questions unanswered after raising them (some how reminds me of the fairer sex)

Reflection

I dislike going shopping with women which can be considered to be a true phenotypical expression of the inheritance of the Y chromosome. In any case considering it is easier to comply and accompany and thereby expend lesser time than arguing and accompanying. This time things were better.

Following is an excerpt of conversation which takes place in a tiny restaurant in our tiny town.

Mom: I think the milk shake at home is much better than this one.
Moi: Honestly, I believe this is better and besides it is very difficult to evaluate the relative "good"ness of things which are ones own creation. Don't you think people who make things inherently would feel that it is good , considering of course that they put in a sincere effort according to their own standards.
Mom: It would feel good only if it is good.
Moi (stunned since I just read Euthyphro around 9 hours earlier) : hmmm.. Or is it that "good IS because it feels good" ?
Mom: hmm.. that is an interesting thought.

Then I go on about Euthyphro and Socrates and how it is fascinating that certain ideas that people keep thinking about remain constant over so many thousands of years. (blah blah)

( later.. )Mom: I still think the milk shake at home is better.

Epilogue

To be honest, the actual discussion in Euthyphro which is more concerned about beloved being beloved because it is loved or more pertinently holy being holy because it is beloved by gods or gods loving it because it is holy. As usual i find ethical discussions exceeding boring, eventhough, to some extent I guess that even if Euthyphro is filled with discussion about piety, injustice, and holiness, i find the questions raised concerning the state of being or becoming much much more pertinent and relevant (albeit pointless). To quote Socrates-bhai himself (in Plato-bhaisahab's words)

..Then one does not see it because its a seen thing, but, on the contrary, it is a seen thing because one sees it; and one does not lead it because it is a led thing, but it is a led thing because one leads it; and one does not carry it because it is a carried thing, but it is a carried thing because one carries it. Is it clear, Euthyphro, what I am trying to say? I am trying to say this, that if anything becomes or undergoes, it does not become because it is in a state of becoming, but it is in a state of becoming because it becomes, and it does not undergo because it is a thing which undergoes, but because it undergoes it is a thing which undergoes; or do you not agree to this?

blah-010

...And you know the kind of man Chaerephon was, how impetuous in whatever he undertook. Well, once he went to Delphi and made so bold as to ask the oracle this question; and, gentlemen, don't make a disturbance at what I say; for he asked if there were anyone wiser than I. Now the Pythia replied that there was no one wiser. And about these things his brother here will bear you witness, since Chaerephon is dead. But see why I say these things; for I am going to tell you whence the prejudice against me has arisen. For when I heard this, I thought to myself: “What in the world does the god mean, and what riddle is he propounding? For I am conscious that I am not wise either much or little. What then does he mean by declaring that I am the wisest? He certainly cannot be lying, for that is not possible for him.” And for a long time I was at a loss as to what he meant; then with great reluctance I proceeded to investigate him somewhat as follows.

I went to one of those who had a reputation for wisdom, thinking that there, if anywhere, I should prove the utterance wrong and should show the oracle “This man is wiser than I, but you said I was wisest.” So examining this man—for I need not call him by name, but it was one of the public men with regard to whom I had this kind of experience, men of Athens—and conversing with him, this man seemed to me to seem to be wise to many other people and especially to himself, but not to be so; and then I tried to show him that he thought he was wise, but was not. As a result, I became hateful to him and to many of those present; and so, as I went away, I thought to myself, “I am wiser than this man; for neither of us really knows anything fine and good, but this man thinks he knows something when he does not, whereas I, as I do not know anything, do not think I do either. I seem, then, in just this little thing to be wiser than this man at any rate, that what I do not know I do not think I know either.” From him I went to another of those who were reputed to be wiser than he, and these same things seemed to me to be true; and there I became hateful both to him and to many others.

...

Now from this investigation, men of Athens, many enmities have arisen against me, and such as are most harsh and grievous, so that many prejudices have resulted from them and I am called a wise man. For on each occasion those who are present think I am wise in the matters in which I confute someone else; but the fact is, gentlemen, it is likely that the god is really wise and by his oracle means this: “Human wisdom is of little or no value.” And it appears that he does not really say this of Socrates, but merely uses my name, and makes me an example, as if he were to say: “This one of you, O human beings, is wisest, who, like Socrates, recognizes that he is in truth of no account in respect to wisdom.”

Plato, Apology

--

One of the few things I truly believe in.

[ Recently revived my GBWW effort which i had started at KGP. I personally find the clarity of Aristotle much more impressive than the rambling dialogues of Socrates/Plato ]

blah-009

If a man hasn't found something worth dying for, he isn't fit to live.

- Martin Luther King Jr.

blah-008

But all who are not fishes are soon tired of water;
And they who lack their daily bread find the day very long;
So the "Raw" comprehend not the state of the "Ripe"¹;
Therefore it behoves me to shorten my discourse.

Maulana Jalalu'ddin Muhammad I Rumi, Masnavi i Ma'navi

Drink wine This is life eternal
This is all that youth will give you
It is the season for wine, roses and drunken friends
Be happy for this moment This moment is your life.

Khayyam,?

The Moving Finger writes; and, having writ,
Moves on: nor all your Piety nor Wit
Shall lure it back to cancel half a Line,
Nor all your Tears wash out a Word of it. ²

Khayyam, Rubaiyat

--
1. Raw and ripe are terms for Men of externals and Men of heart for the Mystics.
2. Pretty much why I am so apprehensive about writing a paper :P

blah-007 Limits

We are.. in search of our limits. We start with a single step, but, none of us stops there. With determination, a step becomes a stride, and a stride becomes a leap. With discipline and desire, we push ourselves to new heights. When we rise to the challenge we discover new strengths, our muscles grow stronger, our minds more agile. The body responds performing its marvelous inner dance of life.  We share a design so magnificient, we can delight in movement itself. To find joy in the struggle to be our best - this is the adventure that defines the human spirit that drives us to the limit.

Jon Boorstin, To The Limit¹

--

1. A truly amazing documentary, which I guess I found all the more interesting , since it probably gives me some reason( or excuse?) for all the crap I try to do.

1273: Dedication

Dedication (2007) by  Justin Theroux.

I watched it around February probably, and keep going back to a few lines.. like "Life is a single skip for joy" or the interminable wale of grief which I used in Not. It i just a jumbled up story of a children's story book writer and an illustrator. I don't think the movie is that great at all.. except maybe a few moments.

Any ways.. these somehow struck a chord.

From

...
Lucy: I'll have a Caesar salad and a side of mashed potatoes.
Henry: Bulimia?
Lucy: No, hungry.
Henry: You're sure? That stuff comes back up pretty fast.
Lucy: Now that I'm in you're really gonna have to try harder to knock me off my game
Henry: You see our waitress over there. She wants to be an actress. She's got that air of entitlement mixed with desperation. She doesn't have the looks though. She doesn't even have the talent, but, like an old donkey she has been at it so long, she's not fit to try to do anything else. She lies to her mom. She's embarassed to tell her about losing the job for the big Palmolive commercial, but, fingers crossed, she's got an audition for Blockbuster Videos. She had an abortion once. She still cries about it sometimes eventhough she saved that thing from an agonizing life of eating leftover mashed potatoes and watching its mom lose jobs like Palmolive commercials. She's got about three ovarian eggs left.

In addition to being less interesting and much less attractive, you are also so much more pathetic.

You are not in.

and

to

Henry: I've spent my whole life... wanting something... and doing my very best not to find it. Never even going near the places it might be... And suddenly, I've got the goddamn thing practically chained around my neck.
Lucy: What are you talking about?
Henry: You. You. You're the, you're the... You're, you're- you're the goddamn thing. Ahhh, uh. I mean... You're, you're. I can't describe you... uhh, I don't, I don't write that kind of shit, I write... You know, the people who write, who write the real books, the love books, and the poems, and even those stupid little fucking novels with the hunky assholes on the cover...
Lucy: Stop...
Henry: You know it? You know what I'm talking about? You know - you're like Princess shit! You know? Fairytales. You know what I'm saying? The million guys are after and you're blinded by your beauty kind of shit. Real big stuff. You know, that just - even, we got the dick that kidnaps you and sticks you in a cave and you're guarded by a five-headed dragon, you know and the tales of your plight are spread throughout the land and all the guys go and put on their shoes so they can see what's up and none of them have the balls to save her except for me. I would go through anything... for you. And still, there I was looking for a way not to see it. Anything. Money...
Lucy: You stupid idiot.
Henry: Yeah.
Lucy: Yes.
Henry: Yeah... big fat stupid idiot.
Lucy: I hope you're better to the next one.
Henry: No - wait...
[he digs in his bag and decides not to give her the dedication to Simone, but grabs the pebble he had given her and then thrown back onto the beach and went back for later]
Henry: It was easy to find... it's the only one like it.
Lucy: You broke my heart, Henry. I don't think you can trust people. You always have to find something wrong. I'm just... I'm sorry. I'll miss you.

and later :)

Lucy: You'll never throw it away again?

blah-006

Mankind is too fond of variety to be always pleased with the same decorations. We are alternatively pleased with the gay and the serious, and even with the pathetic, even the horror of a battle has its beauty, and out of fear springs pleasure.

Piranesi, Diverse maniere di adornare camini(1769)

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Nous parlons avec l'hémisphère gauche

Broca, 1864

1279: Not

When the best things to sayare the things which cannot be said,
I wonder..

why I miss
the choices I never made,
the days I never spent,
the lives I never lived,
the dreams I never dreamt,
the memories I never had,
the pains which I never endured.

It is not that Life seems meaningless without you,
Or the world any less grotesque
Or science any less profound or art uninspiring and religion any less hypocritical
Or literature less intricate and philosophy any less boring.
It is not that Life is nothing but the occasional burst of laughter
rising above the interminable wail of grief[1]

Maybe,
It is just that we never met,
as if we somehow lost an era we never had.

--
1.  Dedication(2007)